We get asked this a lot at Made By Mammas and have discussed it at length on the podcast but in short, it’s not an easy thing to do! Life is already chaotic with a toddler running around, and then you introduce a newborn into the mix and it goes from being crazy, to being ridiculously crazy in heartbeat. I guess the first place to start is by saying, you already know what a life flip it is because you’ve already got one child…we still stand by the fact that going from zero to one is the hardest thing you’ll do. The house will be full of nappies, baby equipment and sleepless nights, so you know what is heading your way the second time round!
Let all feelings of guilt go. Both of us felt really guilty when we found out we were pregnant with our seconds. We questioned daily how we could possibly love another child as much as our firsts? Will the bond between us change somehow? Will they feel like we’ve put them aside for the new baby? How will we give them all our attention when we’re feeding and caring for a new tiny human? It feels strange to write these thoughts down, but they were very real at one point in our lives, and it took a lot of talking to one another to process this massive moment.
THINGS THAT HELPED US
Depending on the age gap, your eldest can help you get the wipes, give the new baby a bottle, sing songs and be your right-hand person. They love the feeling of being involved.
We recommend buying a present for your eldest, from the new baby, it makes them feel like they are part of it all and haven’t been forgotten about. In the early days, make sure you pop out, even for half an hour with them, take them for a walk and an ice cream, one on one time is so important.